Stress Management

Every week we seem to hear about someone who is suffering from stress. It is becoming more widespread as the pressures and demands of modern living takes its toll.

Stress can originate anywhere and the causes are numerous. Rushing in the morning for work, bills in the post, poor relationships, traffic hold-ups, being late for meetings, criticism, pressure, lack of appreciation or understanding: the list goes on and on.

What is stressful for one person may be perfectly acceptable to another. Indeed, some people seem to thrive on stress while others seem to go to pieces over the slightest little thing. Stress, it seems, is not triggered by an actual event, but how we as an individual react to that event. A situation which makes us feel stressed one day could have no impact the next. More usually, there is a gradual build up of stress, which may or may not, eventually exceed personal tolerance levels.

Not all stress is bad; we need a certain amount of it to motivate us, to get the best out of us. Without stress we can become apathetic, lethargic, lazy. Stress is activating. But as with everything, it's all a case of balance.

There are two main types of stress, ‘Eustress' is the positive, and ‘Distress', the negative. There is also Post Traumatic Stress, which, as its name suggests, can occur as a consequence of a past traumatic experience.

You might feel yourself to be under constant pressure and unable to cope with the demands of today's hectic lifestyle. It seems strange that when we have so many time-saving, labour saving devices: washing machines, microwaves, tumble dryers, dishwashers, fast cars, to name but a few, yet many of us still find it difficult to enjoy quality time doing what we really want to do. How much time have we actually gained from these inventions? When we do have the spare time, how many of us feel guilty when we are inactive or doing something for ourselves?

Many people today are suffering from ‘information overload' too much information for the brain to cope with. We wake up with fuzzy heads and we go to bed with fuzzy heads. Some companies put undue pressure on their employees; performance, productivity, and profit - the competition is fierce, and we must all pull our weight or face the consequences. In some companies it is even frowned upon to take your allotted vacation time.

Primitive man was governed by the need to hunt for food, and the animal body is designed to act or react - as in the ‘fight or flight' response. When faced with danger the blood flows away from the stomach and to the limbs (hence that sinking feeling), to enable man to run or fight; the digestion shuts down, which is why it is never a good idea to eat when under stress, otherwise you could suffer from indigestion. The muscles become tense and ready for action, the glands secrete adrenalin, a powerful chemical eventually, when the threat of an attack is over the body returns to a state of near normal, but it is still on the alert - remaining vigilant.

Technology has advanced at a far greater speed than human beings have. And the stressors of yesteryear are very different from the ones of today. We rarely need to fight or flee these days (even though we may feel like doing so), but our body is still prepared to do so.

In consequence all that negative energy accumulates in the muscles. It may cause ulcers, migraine, tension headache, irritable bowel syndrome, anxiety or panic attacks, perhaps just feelings of general unease. There could be dizziness, irritability, a feeling of being constantly ‘on edge'.

Too much stress results in failure of the immune system to produce those important T cells that help to fight off infection. The immune system then attacks itself, resulting in arthritis, ME, MS, HIV, allergies, asthma, to name but a few.

It is known that bereaved people are more at risk of illness than partners who are together. The mental state is lowered leaving them wide open to negative influences.

So what can we do to discharge the stress?

For a start, take a look at the cause of your stress and see if you can do something about it. At first glance this may sound obvious, but if you analyze the cause you may find that the reason is not always so easy to pinpoint. For example, you may be stressed because of the amount of work that you have to do, perhaps you are dealing with complaints or difficult customers, or trying to achieve impossible targets etc.

If you can do something to alleviate the situation then do it. But if not, accept that you have to change your reaction to it.

You cannot change other people. People can change, and often do, but that is their decision. Therefore if you are the one who is suffering from stress then you are the one who must change. It is that simple.

Now I can almost hear you saying ‘'Of course it's not that simple! Don't you think if I could change I would have done?” Well, maybe, but maybe not. We are all resistant to change; that is simply human nature, but also you may be blaming other people for the cause of that stress - which is also, to a certain extent, human nature. But we can change, when we decide to.

Hypnotherapy can be extremely effective in helping you make changes where they are needed, with dealing with your response to stress, and with teaching you to remain calm and relaxed.

One of these ways entails using simple mind techniques to re-program the subconscious mind to accept a healthier and more beneficial outlook.

A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, "How heavy is this glass of water?"

Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g.

The lecturer replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance. In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes."

He continued, "And that's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on."

"As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden."

"So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down. Don't carry it home.  You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can."